8 Secrets To Become An Instantly Better Listener Posted on January 8, 2019January 8, 2019 by admin 1) Passionate Individuals Use a Great Deal Of Absolutes. Words such as these can drive you mad if you hear them literally. They could derail a conversion very fast. Do not hear absolutes verbatim. If you do, you’ll wind up debating facts rather than communicating. Stop what you’re doing when someone is speaking to you. If you’re watching tv, turn it off out of respect for the individual who’s talking. This is a excellent way to demonstrate value to someone. Do it for kids, your spouse, your friends and your own parents. This provides a message that they’re more important than what you’re watching or doing. Can it without sighing or creating an aggravated expression. 3) Look At The Man Who’s Talking. It tells the person who’s talking that you’re listening and are engaged in the conversion. Eye contact shows that you’re interested in what the individual has to say. Lean slightly forward to further communicate interest. Uncross your arms to demonstrate openness to what they must say instead of arms crossed that will be read as defensiveness. A two ears and one mouth strategy makes it possible to keep listening on your mind as a priority. It’s much better to be a fantastic listener than to be a fantastic speaker. Shy people may disagree it is the truth. 6) You Don’t Have To Make Your Stage Right Now. Do not steal the dialogue by jumping in too fast to create your own point. Be patient. Just listen. You will get your turn. You’ll have more information. You’ll have better understanding also. If you’re angry, it could be a better idea to wait to make your point. 7) Don’t Retaliate. If the person says something you do not like that you don’t have to react. A smart person doesn’t retaliate. They listen. 8) Girls Are Upset For The Reason You Think. This one is for the guys. Women do not do it intentionally but they speak in a coded message. Everything you hear and what they say are often two distinct things. Men have a tendency to hear that something has to be fixed, what they do is not good enough, griping, nagging or complaining. He basically hears that he’s doing a bad job and he gets a zero for his effort. He believes”a zero” is absurd and unappreciative. He subsequently stops listening. It’s important that a man doesn’t hold this common but false conclusion. This is the reason teenage sons can not hear their mothers and I will always have a job for a marriage therapist.